In four days

The time for Spring Break is coming close. In about four days I will be boarding a plane, along with 12 students, to our final destination in San Salvador. Along with essentials and clothing, we will be carrying supplies of vacation Bible school materials and clothes to be able to perform some construction work. We will be fighting all different ranges of emotions from excitement to anxiety to nervousness to fear. For some of us, this will be our first time traveling to a different country. For the rest of us, this is another experience that we would be able to put on the list of places where we saw God working. Due to the time of the flight, some of us would be functioning on 1-2 hours of sleep or nothing at all. Three of us would have to reassure ourselves that, as leaders, we have got this and to expect the unknown. For the 12 of us, we have to trust the leadership and open our minds to what will be present to us. One of us would fight to not think about their thesis proposal that is due the day after they come back. Some of us would enter that flight not knowing that we may be the ones that got sick because we drank the water. A number of us would be grateful for the change of the scenery we would be exposed to. One of us would remember the time when they were a freshmen going on her first spring break mission trip and how that would change the course of her life.

Leading the trip to El Salvador is already stretching and growing me in so many ways that it will probably take me a couple of weeks to process. I am learning a good amount of leadership with my co-leaders. They remind me that it’s crucial to think about the details and that it is ok to have a plan. They also provide insight to the logistical aspect of the trip. I know that I’m already having an effect on them due to the trust that they continue to place on me. They ask for my insight and advice on how a certain situation should be dealt with or how a student would feel.

In four days, I would be facing a week of new lessons and experiences. I would have to make some decisions that would be uncomfortable or awkward. I would have to rely on the students and their abilities and skills. I would have to let go on what is happening back in grad school. I would have to remind myself what leadership is about. I would have to give up a couple of luxuries to fully enjoy the opportunity I have. I would have to embrace humility and vulnerability in front of my students. I would have to remind the students of the simple life lessons. I would have to remind myself to stop talking and listen.

I’m not nervous. I’m anxious. Let’s get this thing started. I want to already be there. Bring it on, El Salvador, bring it on.